Breaking Free From Addiction

My pastor once said, “under two clouds friends rarely meet.” I met my friend last yesterday afternoon. We both cried for like the first ten minutes because it had been so long since I had seen her. When I was crying I was just thinking about how nice it was to see her and to see someone that had known me since my youth. We had a lot of catching up to do. When my pastor said that to me it was in a dream. My parents drank a lot when I was young. I had to babysit my younger sister when most of my friends were out together. I developed sort of an indifferent relationship with my friends from school. I thought that they would never be around to help me with my sister and this made me angry and it made me feel isolated and alone in the world. My parents used me to meet their needs at the time. Their needs centered around addiction. They were the two clouds. This post is about addiction, how it can destroy us and what we can do to fight back.

Kids brought up in addictive families often feel guilt. This is how the spirit of addiction can destroy children. Guilt causes us to destroy ourselves from the inside. Many dark spirits come from addiction. Guilt is a very heavy one that weighs on the back of the children that live in addictive families. It is often bigger than the kids and can drive them into addictive lifestyles long into adulthood. It is self destructive much like a spirit described in a sermon I heard recently. The pastor described it as a spirit of Jezebel – which does not represent a rebellious or opinionated woman but rather a spirit of self destruction – irrational fear and suicide. It is the spirit Elijah was tormented with when he fought with Jezebel who sought to take his life after he had killed 800 of her prophets. The irrational fear being that Jezebel had any power over Elijah when God had just shown that he was overwhelmingly in favor of Elijah.

Parents who suffer from addiction are dangerous because they no longer are operating consciously. It is their addiction that is operating and controlling their lives. My parents would often go out drinking two nights a week and come home late after driving drunk and sleep in the next day until around four in the afternoon. The whole weekend was eaten up by me watching, feeding and caring for them and my sister. I lived a somber existence on the weekends. My only joy was watching SNL at 12:30am on Saturday night. After that I watched Tales from the Crypt. That is where I became aware of dark things no child should ever see. My dad would fall down a lot when he was drunk. The scary thing was that both my mom and dad were out of control.

I don’t write this to shame them. I only wish more people understood this process in order to avoid being sucked into it.

Addiction is a form of idolatry. It gives full spiritual and physical control over a person to their god which is their substance of choice.

Addiction is a cruel master. it will drive you and your family into the ground and destroy your mind, body and resources – including friendships. Friendships are important but they rarely survive when one person is suffering under the consequences of addiction.

Addictive substances often dull pain because it is the demon’s way of numbing your senses in order to gain full spiritual control over you. When you don’t feel what the demons are doing to your spirit you don’t even realize they are hurting you. You won’t even attempt to do what you need to do cast them out. You won’t seek spiritual help – friends, family, pastors, church family. The demons cause you to isolate by using shame. They cause you to hurt others with behavior that is not even your own and then make you feel shame for your apparent lack of self control and destructive nature.

Life’s existence can be painful. But usually pain is not naturally present where disease is absent. What I’m saying is that demons cause pain. When you are not in the presence of bad spirits, you are less likely to sin, therefore you are less likely to have disease and pain. Disease and pain are a product of the curse which Christians are not subject to because Christ is their body and he never sinned.

What can we do to stop addiction if we are in the midst of it? Well, I think it’s helpful to say there is nothing we can do to fight addiction by ourselves. Not only do we need friends, more importantly, we need love. We need Christ to beat the spirits that are driving our addiction. He is the only one strong enough to do it. We need to pray and ask for Christ’s help. He can cure any addiction.

Keep Your Chin Up

Yesterday I did some shopping for groceries at Costco. As I was looking around at the people there, I noticed many were older and looking very tired. I myself was feeling tired. I started to get irritable because there was a lady there that nearly hit me with her cart in an effort to get ahead of me and get the last of the sample tray. I started to think about it and I got really angry. Then I got in line to pay and there was something wrong with the produce I bought so I had to go back and get another bag of it. I was really irritated. Then on the way out the door, I saw a man that must have weighed upwards of four hundred pounds that was really dirty and stinky. I had to hold my breath when I walked behind him to avoid the urge to vomit. i got in my car and started to exit the parking lot. People were driving faster than the speed limit and riding my tail.

My next stop was Meijer. I got in the parking lot and saw a friend of mine. I felt better. Suddenly it was if the clouds lifted. I realized how negative I was being. I started to think well I can either have a good day or a bad day and I think I would like to have a good day. So I told myself, if my friend Jodi the cart pusher can smile in this heat, why can’t I focus on good things? So I said, “let’s clean this mess up.” I picked up the trash in my car and threw it out. As I walked in I noticed a license plate with three almost consecutive sevens on it. People looked younger, happier and friendlier. Three girls walked their service dog in training into Meijer ahead of me. Everything was better. Then, as if to show me what the lesson for the day was, I walked by the candy isle and there was an old man in a wheelchair with too much cologne on complaining to three Meijer workers. He was the oldest person in the store and he smelled like he rolled in cologne. I smiled and didn’t think twice about it.

When I got home I realized that when I was directing my focus on problems and negativity, I felt old and irritable. Smells became noxious and everyone around me started to look old. Beautiful people know the secret to beauty – positivity. Your mind is like a flashlight and what you shine it on kind of becomes you. There are different areas all around that you can focus on and the outside is always a reflection of the inside. If you focus on the positive, you are literally seeing the face of God because He is good. When Moses focused on God’s image (his backside) on the mountain, his face became radiant. It was so radiant, people had to look away. If you focus on beauty – in any form, you will become beautiful. If you focus on negativity, sadness, filth, ugliness – you will look ugly because your face is a reflection of what you see. I always say, what you behold you become.

It is for this reason I tend to regulate strictly what my eyes, ears and body take in. If I focus on negative media – the news, television, Facebook, I will become negative. Even in terms of what you eat – beautiful and colorful fruits and vegetables tend to bring the most nutrients to the body. My mom has been trying to teach me this lesson all my life. She’s beautiful and she’s in her early sixties. It is because she surrounds herself with beauty and focuses on it. She likes to be outdoors and to garden. She eats healthy foods most of the time. She avoids sugar.

That may seem like a trite add-on to this post but sugar is a very negative chemical. It causes so many problems in the body, including anxiety, tiredness and obesity.

When it comes to religion, people that focus on things that you can’t do as a Christian and things that they don’t accept – the devil, homosexuality, etc, they become those things. Think of the people that carry signs that say “God hates fags.” Their faces are twisted in anger and they actually become an embodiment of anger and hate. This is what led to the downfall of the devil himself. It is why you see the devil in their faces. They focus on what they don’t want to be and in doing so – become it. It’s weird logically but there is overwhelming evidence of it in society.

This is the reason I love nature so much. It’s beautiful. Animals are beautifully created. So are humans. What you put into your mind and body is a reflection of what you are. If it’s ugly, look away. Don’t focus on it. If you don’t focus on the devil and his negativity, he can literally do nothing with you. Something in you has to resonate with him in order for his negativity to stick to you and age you. Don’t let it. Focus on love and positive thoughts and you will beat his attempts to sabotage you. He wants to kill you, simply put. Heaven is in your mind and if you create an atmosphere that is full of light your mind will be full of light and the Kingdom of Heaven will be within you.